Lelo Nea
People often get confused and think of sex toys as something you only use alone. They are a fabulous way to enhance your love making TOGETHER and we are going to outline some ideas for how to use your vibrators with your guy. Obviously, they are fab for solo fun; but sex toys can REALLY amp up the intensity of partner sex. If you have a male partner that is a little bit apprenhensive about incorporating a sex toy, just do as my friend Joan Price says and tell him you’re ready for a “threesome.” You, him and B.O.B. (Battery Operated Boyfriend.)
If he is hesitant, make it all about him. Tell him you are going to use it on him to give him a porn star style b.j. Or, tell him you will get on top and put the vibe between the two of you on your clitoris. He will appreciate the fact that he gets to look at your face, see and touch your breasts and that you are going to do all of the work.
Sexy Ways to Use Your Sex Toy WITH Him: Sex Toys are an Appetizer, Men are the Entree
1. While you are giving him a b.j. put the vibrator against your cheek on the outside so he can feel your mouth humming and vibrating. Just adds a bit of tingle and a new sensation for him. (You can try the simple silver bullet for this toy.)
2. Take your panties or g-string off and wrap a bullet style vibrator in your panties and then rub the vibrator on his testicles, the shaft of his penis, all over his nipples and then maybe a little on your nipples, too. He will feel the silkiness of your panties and the vibe! FUN!
3. For men who are more comfortable with a vibrator, rub it on his testicles while you are giving him oral. This can make a b.j. very efficient, ladies. (Some men finish much more quickly then normal when they have a vibe on their balls. Just saying.)
4. For men that are super comfortable with toys, rub a little lube on the perenium (taint) and rub that area with a small vibe. Make sure he knows he can trust you not to do anything he is not comfortable with while you are in that area. (Most men describe a prostate massage as one of the most intense orgasms they have ever felt, but not all men are ready for that and NOBODY wants to be surprised in that area.) But, light vibration under the balls on that little soft spot can be very intense for them. (Have you seen the Aneros prostate massager toys for men?)
5. How about giving him a massage and tucking a small vibe into your hands while you massage his inner thighs, his back, his neck and the back of his thighs with some oil and a vibe. There is also something called a massage mitt which you can use for massage and tuck in a vibe into the mitt.
6. While he is going down on you, have him slide a small g-spot toy like the Finger Fun into your vagina with the g-spot tip angled towards your g-spot which is on the belly button wall of your vajayjay. You will have a super intense orgasm and it will make oral on you VERY efficient. He can also tease your clitoris with it and help you to have a clitoral orgasm very quickly…. or maybe two… or three…. or four ???
7. Give up total control and give him the battery pack. Try giving him a b.j. or while he is inside of you, put it on you clitoris. Give him the control and let him turn the vibe up or down. (Very fun with the 5 speed bullet as it has 5 pulsations and escalations and can get you trembling and climaxing together!) You won’t know where he is going with it and it can really add to the anticipation and the playfulness that will make your experience that much better.
8. Tie him up or maybe just blindfold him and make it all about him for an hour or a half an hour. Get him good and relaxed and touch every inch of his body with your hands, tongue and body…but occasionally slide a vibrator on low on his more sensitve areas…. but avoid touching his penis for a little while. Have fun watching his penis twitch, get hard, relax, get hard and repeat. You can get a feel for which sensations he REALLY likes and which sensations he really DOES NOT like by watching the reaction of his penis. FILE THIS AWAY ladies! Good info for later. (A fun toy for this type of play is the Mystic Wand. It’s truly a cordless back massager and it’s got 7 speeds and some of them are very low which can be nice for this kind of exploration.)
9. Last but not least, find your favorite toy in your dirty drawer and give it to him. Let me know you want a little warm up with your fave toy, but you want to include him. Have him strip down, lay next to you, cradle your back or neck with one of his arms so you are face to face and able to make out. He has the toy in his other hand and can use it on you while still feeling like is a part of the process. (Though some men love to be in the “catchers” position up close and personal with the toy and your clitoris.) It’s a great way to feel very connected when you are using a toy with your lover.
For women, a small vibrator on their clitoris is pretty much a guaranteed orgasm. Our BONUS TIP #10. When you are making love, put a small bullet on her clitoris while she is on her back, or while you are having sex doggy style, or on her side, her on top, reverse cowgirl.. you name it, it works. She gets the benefit of a clitoral orgasm from penetration which rarely happens. He gets the bonus of knowing she had an orgasm so he does not have to worry and ask that dreaded question. And, when a woman climaxes, her vagina contracts and tightens down on the penis and can really enhance his experience! It’s a WIN WIN!
Enjoy our blog? Join our Facebook FanPage at http://www.Facebook.com/BlissConnection and if any of the toys interest you, be sure to browse our very tasteful online romance store at http://www.BlissConnection.com and use the coupon code BLOG for a FREE Waterproof Bullet with your $50 purchase.
Blissfully, Chrystal Bougon
Sex Toy Expert
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
I totally agree with this article. I have always been a sexual person. My husband never liked sex toys, not even lube! After being married a couple of years I wanted to spice up our sex life. I had a bullet that I bought from bliss and I used it from time to time and I wanted to include it in our lovemaking. I knew i would never change him but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t be pro-active. I never mentioned my plan to him because I know he would object. I began integrating the bullet by using it on myself while I pleasured him orally, when I would get to the point of orgasm I would discard the bullet and we would climax together. Needless to say, the sex was great and he never mentioned it. Since that first time he has become more comfortable with my sexuality and it has allowed me to be more open with him and now I am able to climax every time, if I choose to. Now that he accepts my sexuality I’m hoping to help him accept his.
Thanks for the excellent tips, Chrystal. I agree that us guys are at a loss as to what to do with the toys we get for our ladies; it’s nice to know we have some options as well!
And thank you for #10. So glad I finally discovered (thanks to Bliss) how much easier my job can be once toys are brought into the bedroom.
…learn something new every day.
And what about the men that want to use it on there wife who has the issues with toys I’ve tried everything and nothing seems to work