How do you find your mojo again?

by Chrystal Bougon on July 18, 2011

How do you find your mojo again?

I read the most interesting article the other day about whether or not you can get in the mood after you have already determined you are SO NOT IN THE MOOD.  This article talked to men and women about certain times in their relationship when they had no mojo for each other. It could be a situational thing where they were mad at each other for a day;  or it could be one of those marriages/relationships where the sex just stopped from all of the resentment and every day stuff that can sometimes drive couples apart.

So that got me to thinking….  we have an awesome Bliss community here. Let’s share! How do you get out of your funk with your partner. What things have you done to get you back on track. How do you simmer down after an argument to have that yummy ANGRY sex? Or, how have you and your sweetie gotten your sex life back on track?

Are there certain actions or words your partner does that will TURN YOU ON NO MATTER HOW MAD YOU ARE? What do you need to feel that mojo again?

I’d love to hear your input and we can all use this as a resource for ideas for when we are in those tricky situations. So, share away please. I think this will be an interesting blog / thread.

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  • Betty

    Wow, Chrystal. Lots of great questions. I can’t wait to read people’s responses. For me, massage & laughter are the best medicine. But if I’m in a really bad mood, respecting my need to be alone is the best medicine.

  • For me and my girlfriend, it’s all about being silly and laughter. The more we can make each other crack up – the lighter the mood – and the more we forget why we were disagreeing. We have certain events in the past that WERE stressful, but we now joke about.

  • Blissconnection

    I have noticed for me specifically, where I have had some special “code” words with my partner – him finding a way to use those when he knows I am raving mad …. help to melt my mood a little bit.

  • Vicky

    If we’re fighting at night, it usually goes until we’re in bed, in the dark. I usually have my back turned to him and the fight will get to a point where there’s not much more to say. Hubby always makes the first move to make up. He’ll start rubbing my side/leg, kiss my neck, breathe in my ear and tell me he loves me and that he hates fighting with me or that he’s sorry for blowing things out of proportion, etc. But, usually, as soon as he’s pressed up against my back and rubbing my leg, that’s enough to make me melt. 🙂

  • Kathy

    My husband and I don’t have the wild/angry make-up sex, because tension between us feels so bad, that our make-up is more tender (though he might not agree – haha).  It can take a bit of time for feelings and emotions to simmer down, but depending on the situation, and who “started it”, one of us will approach the other.  The best way for us to come together is with compassion and understanding for the others point of view.  If he approaches me tenderly and sincerely, I’m THERE. : )  The vice-versa works for him as well.  I cannot stress enough how powerful it is to show understanding with your partner.  It goes a LONG way.

    If we’ve just simply lost our mojo, it takes one of us to make the dedicated effort to make the moves on the other.  The sparks are always there, but sometimes timing and energy is off.  Normally, an evening on our own, where we ONLY focus on each other, will get us back on track.  NO computers or work is a must in our house. : )

  • Blissconnection

    So true. Understanding and compassion goes a long way in a realtionship. 

  • Blissconnection

    Love to melt! What happens if he is so mad he has his back turned to you, I wonder. 🙂 

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