Sex Toys: Where should you start?

by Chrystal Bougon on February 28, 2010

Silver Bullet

Silver Bullet

I was reminded of this topic last night at my Bliss Pleasure Party. I did a pleasure party here in the Bay Area and most of the women in attendance were over 40. (Sidebar: WOO HOO!)  But, there were two women in attendance that were around 25 years old and both were newly married. I did my best not to scare them, but the party discussion may have startled them a bit. You get 10 women all over 40 in one room with some champagne and strawberries and well, the TRUTH COMES OUT no matter how much I try to sugar coat it.

So, when it came time for the ordering, each woman came back into the room where I have my Bliss store set up and that’s where they do their buying of our products. It’s a cool business model. No one wants to wait for sex toys that is for sure. Our Bliss parties are all about instant gratification. So anyone who wants to buy one can take it home that night.

When the more mature women came back in the room to shop, they each knew what they wanted EXACTLY. 1 bottle of Eros. CHECK.  1 tin of Kama Sutra Honey Dust. CHECK. 1 Love Ring. CHECK. 1 G-Spot Rabbit. CHECK. 1 box of penis rings. CHECK. 1 Anal Vibe. CHECK.  These women were NO HOLDS BARRED, KATIE BAR THE DOOR, my husband and I will take one of everything!  Love these smart, confident, sexy, mature women. It was just so much fun. A great evening that was all about a fab dialogue about what works for some of us and what doesn’t work for others of us.

But, then came in the younger women. I so feel for them. I was 25 once. I remember not really having a clue and not even realizing I didn’t have a clue. I kept telling them “I promise, it gets much much better.” They were nervous about what their husbands would think. They were nervous about getting addicted to a vibrator. They were not sure how to use them, what to do with them, what would happen…. they had never even had a “back massager.”  I thought every girl had experience with a back massager or a shower massager!

So, where to start? I think a toy like the simple Silver Bullet is a great toy for women who have never had a sex toy before or for women who have never had an orgasm before.  It’s pretty much a guaranteed orgasm if you put it on your clitoris and turn it on! I also like that it is very UNASSUMING and should not scare away a male partner that might be anxious about a vibrator. (Though we know that really smart men know that sex toys do all the heavy lifting for them!)  I suggested that to both of them as a great jumping off point. So often women have only heard of the rabbit and so they think they need to have one. Of course, I would love to sell them a rabbit as I love and adore them myself and hey are around $100 compared to $14. But, I just cannot, in good conscience, sell them a rabbit when they are brand new to sex toys. I tell them to start off with the bullet, or the slender sensations or even the butterfly kiss. Once they figure out HOW A VIBRATOR will change their life, they will be back! (Like with a crack dealer, right? First rock is free!) 

One of the things we discussed is that when you have sex with the same person for a long long time, eventually you have to find some ways to keep it interesting. They both agreed with me on that one. So, I think they both have bright futures and their relationships seem strong and since their husbands are young, too, I know it will just take some gentle persuasion and they will be well on their way to wedded Bliss! (Here is an article I wrote called “13 Ways to Use the Silver Bullet.”)

Want to know more about our Bliss Pleasure Parties or our Online Sex Toy Store? Join us on Facebook at and let’s keep in touch!


{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

e-stim August 3, 2010 at 2:57 am

This post is really awesome. Thanks you because you solved my doubt. I found the most common doubt in people are same. They don’t know how to use these toys. Really great and appreciable too.

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