Does Size Matter? Orgasm Girl is back and she has an opinion

by Chrystal Bougon on December 30, 2010

Does Size Matter

In 2009 and early 2010 we were fortunate enough at to have a super fun, super sassy blogger named “Orgasm Girl” write some guest blogs for us. Well, we are very excited that “Orgasm Girl” is back from her sabbatical and she has a bunch of ideas for some new blogs, so stay tuned. Welcome back “Orgasm Girl” … you know who you are! We missed you.

We all know the story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears; Blondie traipses through the woods one day and discovers a house in the forest. No one answers the door, so she lets herself in, tastes 3 bowls of porridge left out on a table, and you know the drill; one is too hot, one is too cold, and the other was just right. The tale of Goldilocks takes her through the same experiments with chairs and beds so she can find the right fit, until the Three Bears walk in and startle the presumptuous visitor from their home and forest, never to return again.

And speaking of tales in the forest, I’ve had enough wood in me to know the right fit. There were a few penises that were so infinitesimally small that I had to bite my lip from laughing, and nearly got to the point of saying, “Really Dude? Why not whip out my dildo and go to town on me with that? I promise I will have more fun.” (I am a bit more compassionate in my actions, however, and quickly sent them packing when the deed was done.)

I’ve scaled a few Mount Everest’s of penises, and might I first start off with, “Ouch at Base Camp One!” There have been a few mornings after where I couldn’t get to the Advil and ice cubes fast enough! Don’t get me wrong, I like a challenge like the next gal, but sometimes overindulgence can come back to hurt you.

You see ladies, I seek a penis that is just the right fit for me, one of medium girth and length, even a bit above average will do fine. I believe there is much more Marathon-type fun to be had in the sack with the perfect size cock, and definitely less limping the next day.

Not one vagina is truly alike, so we must all seek our own penis that is “just right”. I am one of those women who is blessed, (Thank ye Jesus!) with a shallow depth and tight width down south, granted I haven’t bore children yet and do my Kegels as religiously as I brush my teeth. (Hmm, come to think of it, I do Kegel exercises while I brush my teeth!)

 It’s an adventure to find one that is “just right” and we can choose to enjoy the experimentation process along the way. Whether we end up with an ill-sized mammoth, or of the smaller breeds in the animal kingdom, our mission, should we choose to accept it, is to try, try again.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Vibin' Vixen January 4, 2011 at 4:34 pm

Agreed! It’s hard finding the penis that is juuuuuust right. Once you find it, hold on for dear life!

Chewmon34 January 10, 2011 at 12:10 pm

Instead of blogging, you should take the time to actually fill your orders. I ordered from you and never received the product. Phone calls were never returned. Emails didn’t go through. I filed a dispute with my credit card company to get my money back. Is this a scam?

Tom March 16, 2013 at 4:17 pm

Someone who call themselves curvy is hitting her lips from laughing at a small penis man? Well isn’t that the kettle calling the pot black.

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